Beginning of Week 7: No loss

Well I didn't lose this past week, But that is ok...You just must continue on. That is all.

WEEK 6: Birthday weekend

Well I had my birthday weekend this past weekend. It was a lot of fun I got to spend time with my mom which was awesome. I am down 3.0 lbs. for a total of 34 lbs. but then I am only allowing myself to weigh once a week. I tend to go up and down quite a bit; So I get frustrated really easy and tend to want to give up. I am going to push on. People are very encourgeing; so I am just going to keep on keeping on.

CS Lewis once wrote:"Hardship often prepares an ordinary person for an extraordinary destiny."

Starting week 5: Still going strong

Well to say it was a great week last week would be an understatement. I am down 31.1 lbs. so far, but I have realized I can not weigh every day; if I do I get discouraged. I have decided to only weigh on my weigh in day which is Friday mornings.  I have started trying to walk, I am walking on my lunch breaks at work. I am also trying to do a fitness video on the days I don't have time to walk and I asked for a Wii U Fit for Christmas, but found out that my dad got it for me for my Birthday so I can not wait for that. I have been a little stressed out due to lack of money but I am trying to make things work the best I can. I meal prepped for the week this week so I shouldn't have to worry to much the boys will just have to eat what I fix or don't eat. I am drinking my water and a lot of it, I have noticed I am kind of lazy on the weekend when it comes to my water. Well we will see how this week goes....

Start of week 4: New Day New Me

Well it is the start of week 4; I am down 20.5 lbs. I got a hair cut and even put on makeup this morning. I am starting to feel better. I know it isn't always going to be this easy, but I am thankful for what I have lost so far. I can tell it a little bit in my face. I am try to have a more positive outlook trying not to be so negative.  I actually got up yesterday morning and cleaned my house and got almost all my laundry done. I am going to step up my exercise routine and see if that will help with the weightloss. All I can say is so far so good.

Week 3: Heading up that hill:

Well week 2 was a success. I am down 4.6 more pounds for a total of 9.4. I know I will not loose thins much every week but it has been great so far. I feel off the wagon a little this past weekend, but I managed to stay within my calories and points. I just slacked on the exercise which is something I am going to have to get motivated for. I know it sounds funny, but I got so excited that my mom bought me a scale and it is one of those really cool ones that you can link to your smart phone, no fudging on the weight anymore. I have noticed that with all the technology it is actually encouraging me. I don't know if that makes any sense, but just knowing that I got so many steps in yesterday makes me want to get even more today. This is definitely an uphill battle right now, but I fell like that it is totally worth it.

So I am working on myself physically, but I am still struggling emotionally. I let everything get to me from my kids fighting to work to just dealing with inner demons. I wish I could figure out a way to not let stuff get to me. I had what I like to refer to as a "down day" yesterday. I had no energy, I didn't want to deal with anything, my kids kept wanting me to play with them and I just wanted to be left alone, so last night the guilt kicked in because I didn't play Uno with my sons when they asked me to. So I am just trying to learn how to push through the emotions, hopefully one day I will.

Week 2:

I think that I did real good over the weekend. I actually made myself get out and walk, now granted I didn't go very far. I am so out of shape. Baby steps each time I will make myself go a little farther every day. My youngest son loves doing the fitness video's with me in the evening after supper. I am starting off real slow but I think I am doing good. Your reading about a person with NO willpower. I have been praying for the strength to keep on. I have had a lot of encouragement this time. I know it is only the beginning of the second week but I have made it this far. I am hungry, but aren't you suppose to be a little hungry? I am been drinking lots and lots and lots of water. One day I will post of before picture. I lost 4.6 lbs. last week so that was encouraging too. My mom bought me one of those really cool scales you can link to your phone and I have a Fitbit which I love. I have been logging everything I eat and trying to be honest about it. So until next time.

Hi. My name is Lona. I am a single mother of two wonderful little boys, but this blog is not about them; it is about me. I have struggled my whole life with self esteem and Weight. Right now I am at the heaviest I have ever been in my whole life. I weigh 388 lbs., there I said it. I weigh 388 lbs., wow that is hard to read. I have recently went through a divorce with a man I was married to for 15 years. This is the first time in my whole life I have even done things alone for the most part. I have a wonderful family that is there to back me up and help out when I need it, so I am not completely alone.

I was sitting at my kitchen Island and was thinking about all the excuses I have for not making myself better. I was thinking I don't have the time, we are so busy, I don't have money for special foods or programs. When will I work out between work, doctors appointment for my oldest son, and football practice for my youngest. It was excuse after excuse after excuse. My mom had offered to pay for me to do Weight Watchers, and again I was making excuses about how I can't afford to buy diet food I have to buy and fix what my kids will eat. Again excuse after excuse after excuse. As I was sitting at my kitchen island I took a good long look at myself and said I have got to STOP making excuses. I texted my mom and said I AM READY. No more EXCUSES. I posted to Facebook about the journey I have decided to take and found that there were lots of people willing to encourage me. I have to admit I sat there and cried.

I started looking on YouTube for workouts that are for morbidly obese people that would get me started to doing some type of exercise, and you know what I found some good ones. I decided I was going to just try one of them out. Normally I would quit half way through or just watch them do the workouts and not do them myself, but you know what encouraged me was that my 8 year old said "mommy can I do that with you?" We were so busy encouraging each other that I did a 35 minute workout without even realizing I was doing a 35 minute workout. Funny huh.

I am starting this blog mainly to help me work through things and maybe encourage other people who are where I am just fed up with making excuses. I want to encourage and empower not only myself but others as well. I feel that if I use this blog to hold myself accountable it my help me do better on my journey.